I don’t feel well. I have been dissociative, spacey, and dizzy all evening. There’s a sense of urgency to write, and I can’t escape it. I must, I must, I must eject what’s in this crazy, demanding head. I was anxious this morning, but I knew I would be taking my dog Maybelline for a […]
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Whispers Heard as Screams
I’m going on record declaring this complete bull shit. —————————————————————————————– I don’t know what to say really. I don’t know what to feel either. Maybe I am really okay, and it didn’t hurt as badly as it seems. Or, maybe I’m covering up the greatest pain we’ve ever known throughout the gift of numbness. I’m […]
Read MoreI AM the Old Struggle
This weekend was an exercise in futility. Still reeling from the session with Therapist written about here, I unsuccessfully navigated a weekend that was filled with meaning and importance for me, and I failed. I keep going over it in my mind, twisting it, turning it, unknotting it, what was said by Therapist and I’m […]
Read MoreIf the Truth Were Told
I even said a prayer before my session with Therapist today and asked God that I not be so guarded and to help me be open to change. But what transpired between me and Therapist was more than I bargained for, and I deeply regret it. As I remember it, the discussion centered around purging […]
Read MoreEating my Silence
Suspend what you think you know, and hear everything that needs to be said, wants to be said, has to be said, but the words are eaten by silence. You don’t know with whom you are dealing. Ask no questions. p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; font: 12.0px ‘Helvetica Neue’; color: #454545}
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