When words just aren’t enough
I don’t feel well. I have been dissociative, spacey, and dizzy all evening. There’s a sense of urgency to write, and I can’t escape it. I must, I must, I must eject what’s in this crazy, demanding head. I was anxious this morning, but I knew I would be taking my dog Maybelline for a […]
Read MoreWhispers Heard as Screams
I’m going on record declaring this complete bull shit. —————————————————————————————– I don’t know what to say really. I don’t know what to feel either. Maybe I am really okay, and it didn’t hurt as badly as it seems. Or, maybe I’m covering up the greatest pain we’ve ever known throughout the gift of numbness. I’m […]
Read MoreI AM the Old Struggle
This weekend was an exercise in futility. Still reeling from the session with Therapist written about here, I unsuccessfully navigated a weekend that was filled with meaning and importance for me, and I failed. I keep going over it in my mind, twisting it, turning it, unknotting it, what was said by Therapist and I’m […]
Read MoreIf the Truth Were Told
I even said a prayer before my session with Therapist today and asked God that I not be so guarded and to help me be open to change. But what transpired between me and Therapist was more than I bargained for, and I deeply regret it. As I remember it, the discussion centered around purging […]
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