Lady Lazarus

I don’t know what I am tonight . . . or who I am. Sounds ambiguous. Good. “I have done it again, each year in every ten I manage it — Soon, soon the flesh The grave cave ate will be At home on me And I a smiling woman. I am only thirty. And […]

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My head is an extremely dangerous place to be. It's minute by minute.

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To Sleep: Perchance to Dream

I am quite anxious and uneven. Forces are against me… or just in pain. I have gone through a transformation, a metamorphosis of a dark kind. I am not the same me I was at the beginning of summer. Something happened to me to change me, and I can’t change back, though I need to. […]

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I see what I expect.

This would be funny if it weren’t so true. “I see what I expect.” ~ Annie Dillard. I just read her for my American Lit class, and I love that line. I know if all I expect to “see” in me is the worst possible attributes, then that is exactly what I’ll see: the worst. […]

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God, grant me serenity to accept the things I can not change.

********Trigger Warning for talk of sex and abuse********* The world feels like a dream. There are things I wonder if I dreamed about, or if I actually did them. Such as feeding the dogs this morning. I thought I fed them, it felt like I felt them, but I couldn’t remember at all if they […]

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