Write. Revise. Delete. Write. Revise. Delete.
The slow, shy tears of heaviness from an abused child slip out of hiding and slide down my face. I do not feel them.
I am overwhelmed. All the monsters visit me, day and night. I can feel no more.
But I can not ignore the ones who ask to hold on. To find peace.
I do not know who to believe. I just know I’m too tired for life .
I understand. It's okay to rest. We spend so much time fighting to stay alive and to live. It's okay to say this hurts too much. It's okay to do something -anything- that will bring even the tiniest amount of comfort or enjoyment. I watch these short little video clips of my toddler nephew 🙂 or I watch an episode of a Brit Comedy I like on YouTube or I sit on the back porch and have a good cry or I carry my teddy bear w/ me around the house or I eat whatever I want or I take a hot shower or I take a nap. It's okay to rest and regroup and don't think about anything! I hope you feel a bit stronger and less sad soon. *gentle safe hugs if you want them* rl