Both Roads Taken

Another sleepless night so far.  The anxiety has mostly lessened since my previous post,  but the sleepless nights continue despite medication.  Psychiatrist gave me a new med to try, but it gives me an unrelenting headache the next day, and it also causes weight gain, so I won’t use it anymore.  I’ve gone back to my […]

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Anxiety’s Amusement

Once upon a time there was a paradox called Missing in Sight whose anxiety was so rampant and uncontrolled that ten minutes after waking on Saturday morning,  she took her usual cocktail of a Clonazepam and a muscle relaxer to chase the anxiety away.  Meanwhile, she felt she was going insane.  She would hit her […]

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Getting Schooled on my Failures

Today has been a difficult day for us.  In the region where we live, the students have already gone back to school, and all my teacher friends are posting their unabashed optimism and excitement for the new school year. I feel left out. I feel like a failure. I feel grossly incompetent. I still castigate […]

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Time’s Confessions

Time leaves me sad.

Time starts ticking. The thick, heavy hours creep behind me, lethargically following me into my personal hell. Life slows down and elongates itself into eternity. Time spawns replicas of itself, burgeoning forth as every instant feels like infinity. Each second hurls itself at me, expectantly waiting for me to placate the duration with purpose. But I am […]

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