Forgiveness or regret

I’m not sure how to begin this post. I’ve debated on whether to write this, sweep it under the rug, or dive full force into the topic of forgiveness/regret. For us, forgiveness is a four letter word and we rage against people that think you have to forgive to heal. So yesterday we came face […]

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Too fat to die

I need help stopping my downward spiral. I know of at least one alter that is suicidal; some are apathetic, and others don’t want to die this fat. The last statement is really silly, I know. But that is how this mind works. I cancelled my therapy appointment today because I didn’t feel pretty enough […]

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Crowd of people

My head hurts. I just don’t feel right. My alters have been all over the board today; even now, I feel them hovering around. There’s not a moments peace or a moment alone. I am proud of myself for getting out of bed and taking the documents up to our university so we may begin […]

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Friendship for sale

Here I am at Panera Bread Co. I’ve just finished my therapy session and I’m waiting for my movie to start. I’m going to the dollar theater to see Gran Torino. I’m just trying to add structure to my day. Depression has a ravenous hold on me, chomping away at me. This is such an […]

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Fading into the woodwork

Find me please. I’m dissipating into oblivion. I need to be found. I’m not dissociating. I’m just missing. My words are not my own and are borrowed from someone deep inside. I’m too scared to leave the bed; even more afraid to leave the house. Each day is a replica of days prior. Urgent business […]

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