Missing In Sight

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trauma

TBT ~ Metaphor ~ A Comparison Between Then and Now

Welcome to Throwback Thursday where I find a blog post that is at least five years old and compare how I was doing back then to how I am doing now. The following piece entitled “Metaphor” is a poem I… Continue Reading →

Postmortem Revival

She has returned . . . a former, archaic version of myself that I had ignorantly believed I would never need again. Her revival has not been so subtle, and she has reprised her role as the destructor of my… Continue Reading →

grasping at air

there are f e w words. went through R.A.D. self defense simulations yesterday flashbacks    terror     crying 13 hours later still not okay still crying  still scared    still terrified need safe hugs   need peace    need for it all to go away… Continue Reading →

Heroes needed. Apply here.

I’m decompensating.  I am fulfilling everything ever said about me.   In my internship as a 6th grade Language Arts teacher, my parts have been out and I’ve lost time.  My university supervisor has given me feedback regarding a comment he… Continue Reading →

Bathroom secrets

The need to write is strong, but the words aren’t easy to come by. My mind is split. Raked out the center. Emptied of all reality. I’m disillusioned. Our actions are those taken by a troubled woman, but she feels… Continue Reading →

To Sleep: Perchance to Dream

I am quite anxious and uneven. Forces are against me… or just in pain. I have gone through a transformation, a metamorphosis of a dark kind. I am not the same me I was at the beginning of summer. Something… Continue Reading →

I see what I expect.

This would be funny if it weren’t so true. “I see what I expect.” ~ Annie Dillard. I just read her for my American Lit class, and I love that line. I know if all I expect to “see” in… Continue Reading →

God, grant me serenity to accept the things I can not change.

********Trigger Warning for talk of sex and abuse********* The world feels like a dream. There are things I wonder if I dreamed about, or if I actually did them. Such as feeding the dogs this morning. I thought I fed… Continue Reading →

The Revival

Recently I was contacted to give an update to my blog, so here I am obliging. It has been difficult for me to get back to writing because I don’t always remember the posts, and the last thing I need… Continue Reading →

Got Apology?

A couple of weeks ago I posted here about contacting one of my abusers demanding an apology. After listening to everyone’s feedback, I decided it would not be in our best interest to instigate any type of contact with him…. Continue Reading →

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