It takes talent to be an unpopular blogger, and that’s what I have become.  It’s true. There is no room for doubt: my blog is just not popular.  It’s not that I don’t enjoy blogging.  There are at least 15 reasons why I love writing.  But don’t be jealous.  You, too, can be an unpopular blogger just like me if you accept the following 10 tongue-in-cheek suggestions on how to tank your blog.

Ignore your writing niche

Finding a writing niche is all about writing on a topic you are passionate about and with which you have experience.  My niche is in writing for those who have mental health concerns, but I don’t write to it because I need to maintain my reputation as an unpopular blogger. Instead, I write on topics I know little to nothing about.  Here are 101 niches on which you could write.  Always pick the one you know the least.  Readers love it when we are uninformed on our chosen subject.

So, if you want to be an unpopular blogger, ignore your writing niche and blog about things you don’t know. Your audience will love that.

Be an Inconsistent Blogger

To be an unpopular blogger means you need to ignore the idea of creating a blogging schedule.  Some well-known and popular bloggers will encourage you to make a calendar of when you will post and share it with your readers. Don’t listen to them. Never post twice on the same day at the same time. Readers don’t need to know when you blog.  They might start to expect your posts and anticipate reading them, and that’s only good if you want to be a popular blogger, but who needs that kind of pressure?

Just remember, the key to unpopular blogging is to be unpredictable and always keep them guessing.

Ignore SEO Rules

Most blogs are found through search engines which drives organic traffic to your site.  If you like my style of being an unpopular blogger, ignore the SEO rules to ensure your blog will not be found by Google, Bing, etc.

Learning SEO rules is daunting as they frequently change.  Understanding the guidelines can be a full-time job.

If you want to be an unpopular blogger like me, I would definitely discourage you from looking at websites like Moz.com which has a very comprehensive beginners guide to SEO.  Also, if you don’t want to learn anything about blogging, writing, or the basics of SEO, I seriously discourage you from reading anything by the writing guru Derek Haines at JustPublishingAdvice.com.

It’s just not a good idea if you want to be an unpopular blogger.

Always Compare Yourself with Other Bloggers

The best way to become an unpopular blogger is to discourage yourself by comparing yourself and your writing to others.  Always compare yourself to other bloggers and find someone whom you believe has better content than you, has more followers than you,  and posts more than you. This will lead to feelings of disappointment,  worthlessness, and a why-bother attitude, which is key to decreasing your blog posts and becoming the ultimate unpopular blogger.

***In all seriousness, there are plenty of readers to go around.  You have talents, gifts, and abilities to offer your readers that no one else possesses.  Please remember that.***

Insist On Perfectionism

First, make sure you take yourself and your writing too seriously so you will be extra stressed and feel too unwell to blog. You are sure to become unpopular that way.

In addition, nothing will ruin your love for writing more than the elusive pursuit of perfection, so to be an unpopular blogger, you must write because you hate it and derive no satisfaction from it.  This will ensure you feel bad about yourself and can think of nothing worthwhile to write.

Lastly, the best way to destroy your love of writing and increase your perfectionism is to obsess over grammar rules and to revise as you write.  Obsessing and revising helps me see what a terrible writer I am and increases the likelihood of not blogging at all.  It’s all part of the master plan to become an unpopular blogger.

Do Not, Do Not, Do Not Promote, Promote, Promote

Let me teach you a trick that made me an unpopular blogger: promotion never attracts readers to your blog.

Readers have a spidey-sense that tells them when you’ve published your latest and greatest work, so don’t take the time to utilize an email list or post blog links on social media, or use automation to attract readers.  It’s bad for business.

Blogging Content Should Be Dull

Don’t get distracted by creative and innovative writing.  Don’t try and showcase your writing ability by “turning a phrase.” Nobody wants to read that.

Make sure your writing is flat, dull, and repetitive.  Also, be condescending in your writing.  Readers love to feel ignorant and inferior.

Refuse to Interact with Readers

Never, ever respond to a comment on anything you blog or post on social media.  Readers heard enough of you the first time you wrote.  They don’t want to hear from you again.

To become an unpopular blogger means ignoring the very people to whom you are writing.  They will eat that up.

Never Add External Links

Blogging is all about you, no one else.  Do not give credit or mention other writers’ great ideas by referencing their blogs.  Besides, search engines will think you know what you are writing about if you have external links in your post.  Thus, it will improve your SEO rank and eventually drive readers to your blog. Can’t allow that if you want to be in the Unpopular Blogger Club.

Besides,  linking to others’ blogs encourages collaboration and positivity, and who wants that in this cut-throat business?

Never Pay for Additional Blogging Services

There are websites that offer paid services to enhance your blog and provide you the ability to build email lists, check SEO ranking, customize headers, etc.  If you are more than a hobbyist blogger and you wish to make money from your blog, it is imperative that you not upgrade your blog.

Purchasing these “extras” will only attract readers to your blog, in which case I will have to revoke your membership  to the Unpopular Blogger Club. Sorry.  Those are the rules.

***On a serious note, some paid services do yield positive outcomes.  I suggest creating a blogging budget and compare it to the amount of money you are making or hope to make.  Money doesn’t mean everything. You can still be a successful blogger without paying for all the bells and whistles.***

Best of Piece of Advice On Being An Unpopular Blogger

Whatever you do, never, never, never research on how to be a successful blogger.  You especially should never Google this exact phrase: “Great tips on being a better blogger.”  You might find a link that gives 101 steps to becoming a better blogger.  Then how would you live your life-long dream of becoming an unpopular blogger?  It’s like you’re just asking for trouble.

Happy unpopular blogging!