Things are quiet and subdued tonight. Though I feel the need to write, words scurry away. I can’t wrap my mind around what is happening to me.
I listen to music; it is a salve to my soul.
Music speaks to me and comforts me, and I need all the comfort I can obtain now.
I wish I could use my own words to kill my pain, but they do not evolve, so I borrow other’s.
I am empty, tired, drained. I’ve cried so much today that my eyes burn.
I’ll put it on the list of things not to discuss with Therapist.
We went crazy due to this blog post we wrote here to which Therapist has access. Things were said that never should have been and fighting amongst the parts ensued. We will never be able to look Therapist in the eye again. Then we spent Friday frantically e-mailing him, trying to intercept the blog post. His response to the last email brought us some serenity again. It was so simple: He wrote: “It’s not a problem.” That seemed to calm us down.
Tonight I’ve hit a low key. And I just want to walk away, disappear, and never look back. I just need to walk away. Heaven help me walk away.